I was in a slump....

I was in a slump. I had a particular rough weekend of the "poor me's". Once in awhile I get these feelings and sometimes it's hard to pull out of them. The kids were away this weekend and I had absolutely no plans. I was tired and hurting, and ended up holing up in my house. I didn't even want to leave to go to church on Sunday. I had no calls. I was basically feeling sorry for myself.

Thanks for the well wishes on my last post. I was surprised to find that RAGuy posted on his blog my fifth anniversary post (I didn't even turn on my computer this weekend). Sara commented on RAGuy's post that she thought that celebrating my RA was INSANE and that RA basically ruined her life.

I can understand Sara's feelings. There are days when I feel the same way. There are days like this past weekend when I feel sorry for myself and the why me's come creeping up in my mind. It would be nice to not have pain on a regular basis. It would be nice to not have these nodules on my hands. It would be nice to not have to take medicine every day. I'm not always happy how my life has turned out. I DID NOT HAVE A CHOICE IN HAVING RA!

I DO have a choice in how I will respond to it. I want to have a positive attitude. I want to celebrate the little things in my life. There has been lots of not-so-great things that has happened because of RA, but there has been some positive ones too. I need to remember these things because it helps me crawl out of the slumps like the one I was in this weekend. I need to have HOPE.

Happy Fifth Anniversary RA

Well it's been officially five years since I've been diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. Happy anniversary!! I think... Who would I be without RA? Well, most likely I would be working full time, hardly ever seeing my children. I certainly wouldn't have been able to continue homeschooling the children after my husband left. I probably wouldn't be living here either. Wow. It's hard to think where I would be right now if there wasn't RA.

Do I wish that I was healthy and normal? Well, yeah!!! Some days having RA is a royal pain in the butt. I don't like feeling tired a lot of the time, having extremely sore joints, sore feet, achy, fuzzy brained (or meth brained as I sometimes call it). However, there are some things I can be thankful for. I am thankful that I can be home with my kids. I am thankful for the semi-assessable townhouse unit I live in. I am thankful that my drugs are covered with my provincial disability plan. I am thankful that I am doing as well as I am after five years.

I saw my rheumatologist today and wished him happy anniversary. He chuckled. I am going for a MRI soon on my hands/wrists to check for erosions. If I'm doing pretty much the same, we will stay with the drugs I'm on. If I am getting worse, he wants to try some different drugs. I really do like my rheumatologist. He listens to me and is also kind and patient with me. So, anyway, all in all, it was a good visit.

Here's to another good five years, RA!!

Friday Fragments

So what is up the Grey's anatomy?? Did Katherine Hiegl leave the show? Who are these new people? Why isn't Meredith in the latest show (well except at the end)? I don't get it. Not sure it's my favorite show.

I also enjoy watching House, The Biggest Loser (though I haven't picked a favorite yet), Bones, Brothers & Sisters.

Why is it that I am attracted to this man and his character on House? I mean, really. He is not that nice. Actually, he is down right grouchy. Yet, so attractive in a weird way. Anyone else feel the same way?

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I love fall. I love the beautiful leaves falling gently down and the crackly sound it makes when you walk through them. I love apples, apple cider, pumpkin pie and turkey dinners.

Something else happens in the fall..

A friend introduced me to Pumpkin Spice Lattes. I do LOVE them. However, I must confess.... I am a Starbucks virgin. I get to the counter and I start stuttering because I don't know what to order (other than pumpkin spice lattes during the fall). It's like a foreign language that I've never heard of before. I generally go to Tim Hortons for a large black coffee. I don't know what foam, dashes of this or that, no fat latte, whatever means!! So please, help me!! What is YOUR favorite drink at Starbucks??

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I'm loving Karate for Christ. I've earned five stripes so far on my white belt. It fun being with other adults (love you kids, but mommy needs some adult time!!). Last night we learned how to get out of a choke hold, elbow to the gut, hammer fist to the eh special place, and a kick in the knee. Lovely.

I won a bloggy award!!

Lana at Living It, Loving It gave me this award!! I am supposed to now tell you 10 things about me you may not know. I think I have made a list a while ago, but maybe some of you newer visiters might not have seen it.

1. I really hate using public bathrooms. I would rather turn yellow and wait until I get home before using public bathrooms.

2. I have three nephews and a niece. My one nephew calls me "Dee dee".

3. I love to sing and am in the choir at my church. I sing alto.

4. I love music and love to dance but I am usually too shy to do so in public.

5. I teach grade 5/6 sunday school at my church now for six years. I love teaching!!!

6. Aragant people annoy me.

7. Bad drivers annoy me and I "yell" at the stupid drivers in my car.

8. I am Canadian, but I really don't like winter much. It is pretty and I like it for Christmas, but after that I wish it would go away.

9. I love playing cribbage and other card games. My dad taught me how to play cribbage when I was about 10. We recently had a game together (which hadn't happened in a long time) and it was a nail-bitter. He beat me but only by a few points!! :)

10. I love horseback riding, but haven't done it in many years. I used to take lessons as a teen.

I now award Elinor at Welcome to Barton Cottage and Heather at Especially Heather.

Jesus Messiah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_B4VCwhb8Y

This link goes to a youtube video of three siblings singing this beautiful song. At first I wanted to hear it because it was sung by two sisters and a brother just a little older than my three kiddos, but the words and music just brought tears to my eyes. Please click on the link to hear them, but I posted the song sung by Chris Tomlin and the lyrics. (please someone tell me how to post videos!!!)

Jesus Messiah

He became sin Who knew no sin
That we might become His Righteousness
He humbled himself and carried the cross
Love so amazing Love so amazing

Chorus: Jesus Messiah Name above all names
Blessed Redeemer Emmanuel
The rescue for sinners The ransom from Heaven
Jesus Messiah Lord of all

His body the bread His blood the wine
Broken and poured out all for love
The whole earth trembled
And the veil was torn
Love so amazing Love so amazing

Chorus: Jesus Messiah Name above all names
Blessed Redeemer Emmanuel
The rescue for sinners The ransom from Heaven
Jesus Messiah Lord of all

All our hope is in You
All our hope is in You
All the glory to You, God
The light of the world

Chorus: Jesus Messiah Name above all names
Blessed Redeemer Emmanuel
The rescue for sinners The ransom from Heaven
Jesus Messiah Lord of all

I Love

I love rainbows.

I love listening to the rain as I lay in bed.

I love walking in the woods on a beautiful sunny day.

I love the sound of walking in fresh snow.

I love the birds chirping in the trees and trying to guess what kind of bird it is.

I love the first spring flowers and warm sunshine after the chilly winter.

I love the beach and feeling the sand squish between my toes.

I love my childrens laughter.

I love the sound of crunchy leaves under my boots.

I love hearing my children sing in church.

I love listening to Christian worship music.

I love catching my children do nice things for each other.

I love reading a good book in my favourite chair.

I love watching a fire in a fireplace (love real ones best, but fake ones are nice too)

I love a good black coffee.

I love being together with my family.

I love waking up to very little pain.

I love teaching my son and especially love hearing him read out loud.

I love when my girls come home from school each afternoon at 3:30.

I love snuggling with my kids.

I love my life.

proud moments

I've had a few people mention to me recently that they noticed how much my kids love each other. I have always tried to instill in my children that family comes first (after God).

LarryGirl goes to a senior public school and takes the bus. Because of the early start of her school, the other kids are not awake when she leaves for the bus stop. LarryGirl decided from day one to wait at her sister's school for 20 minutes in the lobby until she is dismissed. Then the two walk home together. A neighbour was looking out her window and saw my girls walking arm in arm down the road and then saw my son Moe waiting at the driveway. The three "group hugged" and continued home.

One of the grandpas was joking with LarryGirl saying that she should put a picture of him in her locker. She explained that she just bought a locker set that had a picture frame in it, but wanted to put her best friend and sister Curley's picture in it.

Today LarryGirl was away at her grandparents so Curley and Moe were playing together all afternoon. We all left for evening church. Moe (who is eight) opened the door and got out of the van, then turned around and reached for his sister's hand to help her out of the van and shut the door!!

Things like this just melt me. It is great to remind myself of this when they are all bickering with one another. Maybe, just maybe, they do listen to their mother after all!!!